Star Wars

If you think I might be annoyed about the ignorance of the average Star Wars fan, you probably are way short of the mark. Most images came from the Internet Movie Firearm Database: http://www.imfdb.org/wiki/Main_Page

Slave I isn't that good of a ship. Get over it. It's consummately stupid that Disney went out of its way to idiotically rename it, but it's still a stupid ship, and Boba should feel bad for continuing to tool around in that steaming pile of suck-and-fail for as long as he has.

Here's the article about Slave I: https://thedirect.com/article/boba-fett-ship-name-change As for the Lucrehulk, what can I say? I get the rationale for using an existing spaceframe as the basis for your combat vehicles, but sometimes it just doesn't work out that well. Apparently, these were reasonably effective, but that's only because almost every other capital ship in the Star Wars universe is a larger, steamier pile of suck-and-fail. Also, we now have a Wikitubia presence, for what nothing that is worth! https://youtube.fandom.com/wiki/Sacred_Cow_Shipyards

Ok, since folks have asked, the Patreon is here: https://www.patreon.com/sacredcowshipyards I have no idea if I'll actually be allowed to post that link in the video, so, hey, there it is. Also, this has been a REEEEEDONKULOUS week. I have no idea what's going on. It's crazy. It's certain definitions of "fun". And here we are. Also-also, AATs suck. But, hey, as the video indicates, apparently this channel is monetizable now. Or something. The TL;DR version of this is that I might make a few dimes off you humies watching me trashing you. And I'm ok with that. The slightly longer version is that, hey, you know those YouTube channels that make you watch unskippable ads before you watch their content? Yeah, that's a choice they made. They could have avoided inflicting unskippable ads on you - as I've done - but they didn't. Because money. How's /that/ make you feel?

You might notice that I'm massively less unhappy about Dune being resurrected than I am B5 doing the same. That's because all of the previous attempts at the former have been... various degrees of glorious failures, so there's still the chance for someone to do something right. Personally, I'd love to see the six-hour supercut that Jason Momoa was talking about a few weeks ago.

Well, I /had/ been trying to avoid bringing down the ire of The Mouse, but I guess that's all out the window now. The Slave I will always be the Slave I. Yes, it's part of the Firespray class. We know that. No, Jango (yes, I said Boba a lot - I'm old) wouldn't have bought/acquired/come by a first-of-its-class ship. Those are notoriously cranky things, and tend to have massively fewer features and upgrades than the later classes, as the designers suddenly realize what they did wrong and try to improve on it as they go. I mean, not to go for the obvious example, but there's a reason the Enterprise Class - for your modern wet-navy, not those authoritarian prats flying about space - is only... one ship deep.

And I mean it, too. And, as horrible as the B-Wing was itself, at least it had a certain style about it. This thing? Meh. About the only positive things that can be said for it is that it is hyperspace capable and it does bring a lot of guns and torpedoes to the party. Which is good. Because you're going to be missing a lot. (If you feel like helping me improve my recording situation, you can do so here: https://www.patreon.com/sacredcowshipyards )

Here's the promised Patreon link: https://www.patreon.com/sacredcowshipyards There's even exclusive content there now! Anyways, the LAAT / Republic Gunship is one of the very few craft that Star Wars got exactly right. I mean, the wings are too big for something that doesn't really /need/ wings, and those missile launchers could have been styled a little better, but aside from that, it just looks right. And it performs right. So, hey, something something blind squirrel something nut something.

And, as you will note from the photos in the video, OF COURSE the ITT isn't standardized, in any way, shape, or form. There's, like, five different versions of the blessed thing, because NOTHING in the Star Wars universe can EVER be standardized. As much as I like to rip on the Mon Calamari for producing basically one-off capitol ships, the entire universe has completely buggered their logistics chain. "Oh, you want parts for an ITT? WHICH ONE?"

I have no idea why someone thought a massively overly-complicated, massive pain-in-the-ass-to-maintain monstrosity would make a good startfighter, but here we are. At least it has a lot of guns? --- Many thanks to Deputy Rust - https://twitter.com/DeputyRustArt - for developing the Tomboy Mandalorian.

The video to which I am responding is found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zi571K1Vl4 And they do raise some valid points. I simply contend that their perception of the platform is exclusively based on its performance on Hoth and Endor, and, well, that's not the best look ever, but it's also not the entire picture. As comments there point out, the murder chicken's performance in Battlefront, Rogue One, Allegiance, and so forth indicate these are truly effective combat vehicles. And the simple fact is that if these 'companies' that Cara Dune references didn't have anti-armor weapons, they'd be utterly hosed, regardless of the situation on Endor. (Yes, trees can count as "anti-armor weapons", but given Star Wars' single-biome planets, not all planets have those.) Also, the thought struck me after I was done recording: "companies of men" is a number strictly less than 1000, and possibly even less than 300, given that's the range in size of the next-size-up military unit, known as a battalion. Again, if she'd meant that many people, Cara Dune probably would have said so - she doesn't exactly mince words. Additionally, it occurs to me I didn't do a great job of articulating why the AT-ST is much more an infantry-squisher than a scout vehicle. Put simply, its sensor suite is below-par (especially in comparison to any of a number of droids), and its visibility is even worse. On the other hand, it's fast, lightly armored, and bristling with weaponry, which puts it in the "skirmisher" category, but it doesn't have any dedicated anti-vehicle weapons itself. Ergo, it's generally designed to annihilate job lots of infantry, and do a little forward probing on the side.

Most photos came from Wookieepedia: https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Main_Page or the relevant Star Wars movies / shows / etc. The size comparison chart came from https://www.st-minutiae.com, which is a pretty awesome site. And, yes, all these shuttles are stupid. Deal with it.

Yes. Yes it is. Someone actually sat down and thought about their spaces, what they needed, and how make it all fit together. Most images came from the Mandalorian series from Disney+. You should watch it.

Images borrowed from: https://www.artstation.com/artwork/Pn634 https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Venator-class_Star_Destroyer/Legends and Wikipedia. I don't honestly hate the ships. But they could have been so much better, with very little effort. But that's true of a lot of Star Wars.